


Abomination-ON HIATUS

by Lokiof221B



Category: Sherlock (TV), Supernatural
Genre: AU, Angst, BAMF John, Creature John, Crossover, Fluff, M/M, Reichenbach Angst, superlock
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-01
Updated: 2014-11-07
Packaged: 2018-02-03 00:22:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1724303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lokiof221B/pseuds/Lokiof221B
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John has always felt different from other children, he was smarter and stronger than them and he never really felt like he fit in with his family. When a horrible accident makes him take time off and visit America, secrets start to come out of the woodwork and his life will never be simple again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This is my first longer fic and I'll be trying to update as regularly as I can.  
> Another thing, I'm not American and this is unbeta-ed so if you find any mistakes, please let me know so I can change them :)  
> Enjoy!

To be honest, John had never really imagined his life like this, sitting in a church with his grandmother, listening to priest say a prayer for his family. The older woman sat beside him, weeping softly and holding his hand like a lifeline. She was the last family he had so he allowed it even though she had been one of the people to disown his parents and his sister when Harriet came out and they had supported her.

 

Listening to the drone of the priests voice, John found his mind wandering as was common nowadays when he was asleep or just daydreaming. His mind went back to what had happened just over 3 weeks ago, the Watsons-Harold, Amelia, Harriet and John-had been driving down a deserted little country road on their way to Whitby to see friends when, from around a sharp corner, came a large truck. It was going much too fast for the road and heading straight for them but there was nowhere for them to go. His dad had tried to swerve into the heather at the side to avoid the oncoming truck but from what he could remember, the truck had then started to careen off towards the side as well. By that time, they had ran out of room and his mum screamed for them to hold on. The last thing John remembered seeing before he lost consciousness was his dad take his mum’s hand and look back at him solemnly.

 

John woke up about 2 weeks later, after being in a medically induced coma, to be told that no one had survived the crash, not even the other driver. Apparently Harriet had been awake but fatally injured and had died a little while before John woke up. 

 

He refused to say anything for his family as his head felt like it was filled with cotton wool so his words probably wouldn’t be coherent.

 

John was pulled rather violently back into awareness by a tug on his hand, his grandmother was trying to lead him outside to see the graves as the service had ended but he just pulled away and went back to his car. Holding his head in his hands, he cried silently and privately for his family, hoping they were in a good place. After a few dry sobs he pulled himself together and allowed the military façade to fall into place, his dad had taught him everything he had known once he found out John wanted to follow in his footsteps and become a military man and he would honour his memory by putting it to good use.

 

A few weeks after the funeral John was in his parents home, boxing things up to be sent to storage or the charity shop when he saw a brochure for a holiday to Florida.

‘Maybe a break is what I need?’ 

John questioned himself, not really liking the idea of taking a holiday but maybe he could travel instead, a change of scenery might actually do him good.

 

So he finished packing everything and took the first plane out to America that he could after withdrawing money for the trip and packing a few things. John had never been very impulsive but he couldn’t stay in England, he had nothing there and he didn’t know what he would do.

\-------------------------------------------------  
2 months later

 

John was tired, hungry and cold but he thought if he could just make it to the next town, he could find a hotel to stay in and he would be able to regroup from there. When he finally rolled into the small town of Sioux Falls in South Dakota, he breathed a small sigh of relief and paid for the cheapest room he could find in the dingy little motel. As soon as he got to the room, he threw his rucksack into the corner and flopped onto the bed in an undignified heap, he was asleep before his head even touched the pillow.

Please God, let there be no nightmares...

 

In the morning, he woke up feeling almost content, he had been too tired for nightmares thankfully but that didn’t mean they didn’t linger at the corner of his mind just waiting to pounce on him when he let his guard down for just a second. Dressing quickly in jeans and a clean shirt, John made his way out of the motel and made his way down the street to find some sort of diner where he could get some breakfast, he was famished and would probably turn into a big green monster if he didn’t get his daily fix of tea (or caffeine, it depended on his mood). It was a funny little habit he retained from England but he made sure that everyday he had a cup of tea, it probably wasn’t healthy but it reminded him of home nonetheless.

 

Luckily for the people of Sioux Falls, there was a cosy little diner a short walk away from the motel where he was staying. As soon as John walked in, he could smell the apple pie that was baking and fresh coffee behind the counter, he ordered both and asked for a cup of tea as well. The waitress looked at him a little funny for ordering the two drinks but soon started to smile once she heard his accent.

 

“You’re not from here are ya sweetie?” She gave him a sweet smile and he wondered what the harm would be in a little flirting, he knew he wasn’t bad looking and he hadn’t really had the opportunity (or the will) to find any company since the funeral.

 

“That easy to tell, huh?” Laurie, as her name tag said, chuckled softly and with a wink, she turned around and brought back his food within a few minutes. As there usually weren’t many people in this early, she sat down with him and they talked while he finished his breakfast. 

 

He left the diner about 40 minutes later with a napkin with Laurie’s number scrawled on it and feeling much lighter, as if the world had been taken off of his shoulders. John carried on down the street a little ways but soon discovered that there really wasn’t much to do, maybe he wouldn’t stay here for very long but then again, there was Laurie now…

 

Soon he made his way back the motel and got changed and, knowing it was still too early to do anything else, he went for a jog following a dirt track that Laurie had told him about when he mentioned he liked jogging. Listening to the beat of his trainers on the ground and the sounds of birds, John thought back to how Harry would have hated this, she was very much a city girl and had moved out to London at the first chance she got. About thirty seconds after that realisation, he almost stumbled when he thought about how easy it had been to remember his sister without cringing or feeling like breaking down. 

 

The move out here had really made a difference but he still wanted to join the army and help people, all his life he had aspired to be a doctor and as he got older he realised that he wanted to be an army doctor no less. Being out here in America just wasn’t fulfilling his dreams and for the first time he wondered if it was almost time to be heading home.

\-----------------------------------------  
As he was running, John started to notice that he wasn’t running on a dirt track anymore, it had turned to concrete at some point and he was surrounded by trees. Not having any other choice, he kept going but slowed down to a fast walk and when he saw a sign for a ‘Singer Salvage Yard’, John thought he should just ask for directions back to the main path. Hopefully there would be someone there and they wouldn’t turn out to be a gun-wielding old man.

 

John slowly walks closer to the house he could now see, his movements confident and sure, all around him were old, beat up cars and to be perfectly honest, the place looked abandoned. The big house gives him the creeps but despite not being as sure now, he carries on walking but keeps to the side of the road so when he hears a truck behind him, he easily ducks into the side and takes cover behind a car, not knowing whether it’s safe to be here or not.

 

About 30 seconds later, John sees an old Chevy making it’s way up the path to the house and from behind him he hears a door opening. As the truck draws closer, John withdraws further and watches as 2 teenagers come bounding out of the house and towards the van. The van pulls to a stop just in front of them and John is close enough to hear a muffled shout come from inside the vehicle. He watches as the 2 boys move away and the door opens and out comes an older man dragging a girl behind him. She’s in chains and is hissing violently but she doesn’t seem very afraid.

 

After seeing the girl, John scrambles away from the edge of the path quickly, his mind racing as he tries to think of a way out. He could just keep to the salvage yard and run back the way he came but he didn’t want to leave the girl with what was now turning out to be 2 older men and the 2 younger boys. 

 

He soon realises that even if he could fend off maybe the 2 boys, he couldn’t take the 2 men and he didn’t know if they were armed. 

Should he run? The men hadn’t seen him yet and he could run back, tell the sheriff and get help. John chooses this as his safest option and makes a silent promise to the girl that he will come back to help her. Making his way slowly backwards, keeping his eyes on the men now headed towards the house, he didn’t see the car bonnet that had been left right in his path and he tripped over it causing a horrendous crash that alerted the kidnappers to his presence.

 

John tries to get to his feet and make a run for it and he hears a shout behind him so he piles on the speed, hoping to make it out into the woods. However, whoever was chasing him was faster than he had anticipated and he felt a hand clawing at his jacket trying to stop him or slow him down. 

 

Not hearing any footsteps besides those behind him and the ones he did hear being fairly light, definitely not either of the two men, he suddenly spun around and punched out catching what turned out to be the older of the two boys jaw. The kid reacted quickly and pulled back a right hook that John blocked, training with his dad and the boxing lessons he had done at Uni were definitely helping, and he pulled back a punch of his own and sent it straight into the taller boys nose. Hearing a satisfying crack, he dropped the boy on the floor and started running towards the exit again, John thought he had made it when he heard the very distinct sound of a gun being cocked behind him.

 

He came to a dead stop and tried not to shake his head in anger and fear, he had forgotten to check his surroundings and had allowed one of the men (the one with and beard and baseball cap on) to come up behind him faster than he would have thought possible. John heard an order for him to turn around and when he did, he saw the younger boy on the ground glaring at him as the older one out cold after his punch. The last man had a terrifying expression on his face, caught somewhere between concern, protectiveness and rage, even though he attention was clearly more centred around the two boys on the ground, he had tight grip on the girl. However, she wasn’t crying or screaming, she was looking at him with amusement and John’s last thought before he directed his attention to gun-wielding old man was that something was definitely not right with this picture.

 

He kept his eyes trained on the gun and on nothing else so he missed the first question that came his way. John’s head snapped up and the man repeated the question,

“Who are you?”

 

He thought about lying or not answering but thought it wouldn’t do him much good so he simply said, “John Watson.”

 

All of their eyes widened when they heard his accent and they all had the same, ‘oh shit’ look on their face; John would have laughed if he wasn’t being held at gunpoint. The two older men exchanged a glance and the one with gun just gestured towards the house, having no other choice but to obey, he went inside passing by the prone body on the floor and the glare that was aimed his way with a surprising amount of venom.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next chapter, enjoy!

The house John was walking towards seemed as if it would fall down at the slightest hint of wind but he walked forward confidently despite his worry. There was a prod at his back when he hesitated at the door so John pushed it open slowly and went into the hall, looking around as he did so. 

 

There was no way for him to get away, that was certain because he just didn't know how far these guys were willing to go, there were already two kids here that seemed cooperative enough and John could only assume that they had taken the girl from town. Even if he could get away, he was reluctant to leave the girl behind so going along with whatever was going on here seemed like the right thing to do.

 

John was steered into a living room that looked like it doubled as a library and when he turned around to face the man behind him, he was pushed onto the sofa. 

"Stay put. Don't try to leave. Just, stay." John bristled at the commands but the man in front of him just gave him a stern look and he decided to keep his mouth shut for the time being. He watched as the older guy walked out the door-with the gun-and he soon heard whispers from behind the door.

\------------------------------------------------------------

Bobby shut the door behind him and rubbed a hand over his weary face, taking his cap off.

"This is a bit of a mess John, we have a friggin' demon in the basement and, what, a prisoner in my living room." He sighed heavily and turned around to face his friend, "how's Dean?" 

It looked like the boy, John, had hit him pretty hard but he hadn't stayed around long enough to see if he was okay.

 

"Yeah he's just spitting feathers at the moment. You didn't see it Bobby, that boy hit him once and he was out cold for about 10 minutes, he's only just come around! I don't know of anyone that can put Dean down like that." The only thing he could do was stop and stare, John was right, not even Bobby could fight Dean we'll enough to even get him on the ground, the boy had learnt fast and would make an excellent hunter when he stopped so angry at every little thing.

 

"Right so, how about we leave the demon for now, it's not going anywhere and we figure out how were gunna fix this mess?" John just nodded back at the living room door and shrugged, seems he didn't have any better ideas so Bobby just turned back and opened the door again.

 

Inside, the boy hadn't moved an inch but there was a glare levelled at him and John that immediately made him want to shrink back but he carried on regardless.

"So have you figured out what you're going to do with me yet?" The steel in younger John's voice reminded him of Dean's stubbornness and the accent suited the indignant look perfectly.

 

"Yup. You are gunna sit nice and still while we do a few tests, then we'll talk about maybe letting you go." Bobby watched the boys expression change from wary to shock and back again and he spared a glance to see John looking almost amused. 

 

About 10 minutes later, all the tests he could think of were done: salt, holy water, silver etc. but he hadn't reacted to any of them with more than probably thinking they were crazy. 

"So now I've passed your tests, what was this about letting me leave?" He was so polite that it startled a laugh out of John and they both relaxed while the boy just looked even more tense, not afraid, just tense.

 

"Ok how about we make a deal, you don't say a word about anything you've seen to anybody and as soon as you get back to town, you pack your stuff and you leave Sioux Falls. How's that? You get to go and you never see us again." Bobby was sure it would never work but it was worth a try, he didn't want to tell this boy anything if he didn't have to.

 

"Do I look like an idiot to you! I'm not going anywhere without that girl and even if you make me leave, of course I'm going to tell people what you're doing." This kid is crazy, it's like he has a death wish or something.

 

Bobby stayed quiet in the wake of the boys anger and he looked at John, not knowing what to do, if they didn't tell the truth, they were stuck in a standoff and if they did tell him everything then he would probably think they were crazy. Tough call.

 

"Alright you know what? Fine. Your not taking that girl with you because she's not a girl anymore, she's a demon. The whole raised from hell bit, yeah. And while we're at it, everything else is real too, vampires, werewolves, ghosts, shape shifters all sorts. We hunt them. It's what we do so if we let you go, you can't report us because that girl will be set free and she will kill people." All Bobby could do was stare at John stunned, it was a rule of theirs, you don't tell anyone the secret unless there's was a very, very good reason.

 

It looked like the younger John had swallowed a lemon, his face was pinched and he was looking between the two of them with a disbelieving look on his face. He wasn't going to believe them, he was going to try and run screaming from this house and they were going to have to be very creative and try-

 

"Alright. Can you prove it?" Again Bobby was stunned as he nodded absentmindedly, the boy just looked at him expectantly and he gestured for him to follow them both down to the basement. Once there, it was simple all they had to do was get the demon to show its black eyes and John would be convinced, hopefully.

\-------------------------------------------------------

This was the craziest thing he could possibly do, who asks a guy that is clearly a raving lunatic, to prove said lunacy. It was going to end badly for John, he could tell something bad was about to happen but here he was walking along like a good little prisoner. He walked down the stairs covered in front and behind by the two men and when he reached the bottom, he saw that the girl had been tied to a chair in the middle of some sort of giant pentagram. 

 

This was getting stranger by the second and he had a strong urge to run in the opposite direction but he just straightened his back and held his head high, like his dad always told him to. It didn't really help him much as he was still the shortest man in the room but it made his small, stocky stature look more imposing. 

 

As if alerted by an unheard alarm, the girls head snapped up as soon his feet touched down on the floor. What followed was the thing that changed his life, forever. 

 

Her eyes immediately turned coal black, not just the iris, the whole thing and even with his medical training (8 years and an MD to show for it) he couldn't think of any reason for that to happen. She also started to writhe against her bindings and screaming as if possessed, she stared at John with undisguised fear and the house began to tremble and shake. John could catch the odd word in her incoherent screams, "Impossible", "Freak", "Abomination" and he would willingly admit to being really freaked out. 

 

Strong arms pulled him back away from her as the shaking got worse, and the older man stepped forward with a thick, leather bound book in his hands, he began reading from the book and the words seemed to drown out her screaming.

 

"Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus..." As the man kept reading, the girl started to gag and choke and she was no longer screaming, if anything she looked relieved as the man stopped reading and a massive cloud of black smoke poured from her mouth.

 

John just stood rigid as he watched the two men step forward towards the girl sending him strange looks as they checked her pulse. The older one sighed and shook his head, stepping away slowly. They both looked towards him and John couldn't do anything apart from stare at them, "Who the hell are you?" 

 

His voice was weak and reedy but his stare was steady.

"My name is John Winchester, this is Bobby Singer. Those two outside were Dean and Sam. What you just saw was a demon and I'm sorry but you're going to have to stay here for a little while. Demons never react that strongly to normal people and they are never afraid. We need to find out why this one was."

 

The overload of information was getting to him and he slumped against the wall, holding himself up as he looked between John and Bobby, "Right ok. Am I a prisoner then?" 

 

"Sort of, we can't let you leave so you can take that however you want." 

Mind still reeling, John just nodded tiredly and, showing his true British colours, asked, "I don't suppose you're...hospitality will stretch to a cup of tea?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some Bobby/John bonding in this chapter :)  
> Enjoy!

Turns out, Americans didn't readily keep tea in their kitchens but they showed him to a small room upstairs that was fairly comfortable. He didn't know what to think. He had just seen a girl that was so afraid of him that she was screaming and almost having a seizure because of it. Then she had coughed up black smoke, that disappeared before his eyes. John had always considered himself a pretty open minded guy, so he was trying his best to accept this, no matter how crazy it seemed.

Since he had been left alone, John took the time to think back on what the older man, Bobby, had chanted. It was Latin, he had done enough at Uni to know that but what was really weird was that he understood it. All of it. We exorcise you... There had also been an ancient power to it that had flowed through him, sending shivers down his spine and paralysing him, it seemed to shake something that had been buried deep and dormant inside him. A kind of power that was foreign to him and frankly; terrifying.

Sighing, John lifted his head from where it had been resting on his hands and got ready for bed thinking, it's going to be a long day tomorrow.

-

It had been a few days since John had been taken prisoner, the girl had been buried in the backyard, and the other two younger boys had been avoiding him like the plague. Bobby told him it was just because they had always been taught to be wary but he thought it was because he had wounded Dean's ego.

Pulling on a pair of jeans and a comfy sweatshirt, he had been taken to his motel room to get his stuff, he made his way down the stairs and into the kitchen where he could smell breakfast. Bobby stood with his back to the counter with a cup of coffee in his hand but there was no one else in the kitchen that he could see and John raised an eyebrow at him.

"No one here?" He walked over to the antique coffee maker and poured himself a cup before flopping down onto a chair.

"There was a hunt a little ways from here and John took the boys with him. He asked me to stay here and work on a theory as to why that demon almost crapped itself when you turned up."

"Okay then, where do we start?" Bobby just looked at him like he was crazy, again, but John just levelled an expectant look at him.

"You wanna help boy?"

"Well, yeah. I mean it's me isn't it, there is something wrong with me that scared a bloody demon so I'm going to find out why." He could tell that Bobby was surprised but at the moment his temper was hanging on by a thin thread, he was feeling threatened all the time and the bone deep feeling of dread he had, had only gotten worse. With everything that had happened to him, this was either the perfect distraction from his messed up past or the thing that would actually break him.

"We have this friend that's psychic and I think she'll be able to dredge something up that could help. If nothing else we can get a read on you and maybe John will stop being so damn suspicious of you."

"So they're actually like psychic, like read your mind and stuff?" John had accepted that there were a lot of things he didn't know about know so any and all information he could get would be useful.

"When she's in a bad mood, yeah, but you've got good manners so chances are you'll be ok."

That didn't make him feel more apprehensive at all.

"When do we go then?"

"Soon as you're ready. It'll take a few hours to get there so I would get a shower and then we'll go."

Finishing his coffee, John stood up and headed towards the stairs.

-

They had been on the road for a while and had fallen into silence a few miles back, John could tell that Bobby wanted to ask him something but he was reluctant to say anything as he didn't really seem like the sharing type. A few minutes later, he could no longer stand the silence so he glances over to the older man and asked,

"If there's something you want to ask me, go ahead, it's not like I'm going anywhere in a hurry." John tried to keep his tone light but he was worried, what if this psychic woman said he was dangerous, would the hunters kill him?

"Alright, you're handling all this better than you should and you're not from here so what's your story?" He was a bit stunned, John had not expected him to just blurt it out but he had said he would answer so...

He cleared his throat and turned to look out of the window, watching the scenery pass by. John could feel Bobby's eyes on him but he stared resolutely in the other direction, he figured that if he was going to be staying here then he would have to tell someone,

"I had to get away from England, I'd just finished my medical degree and I was all set to join the army as a field medic but, er, my mum, dad, sister and I were in a car accident that," he coughed lightly to clear the lump out of his throat, "it killed the three of them and I just couldn't stand to be there anymore. I left and came here, I'd been travelling for about a month before I found you guys."

John thought it would have gotten easier to talk about but it hadn't, thinking about his family still made his throat tight but he was no longer as lost as he had been. It was strange, meeting the Winchesters and Bobby, actually put him at ease, as if this was what he was meant to do. In the few days he had been at Bobby's, John had been reading all the books he could get his hands on and it made sense to him why the hunters did what they did, helping people and saving lives. That was what he had wanted to do and he felt content with how his life was turning out, strange that he would find comfort with a family of gun wielding hunters. Well when life gives you lemons...

John tore his eyes away from the door handle to look at Bobby and saw an understanding look on the older man's face.

"Well kid, you're preaching to the choir, my, um, wife was possessed and I killed her thinking she'd gone crazy and the boys mom was killed by a demon, John's been after it ever since and he's raised those boys in his image. We all have our reasons for starting to hunt but you have a chance at a normal life, if today goes well, so I would suggest that when Missouri clears you, you hightail it out of here and forget you ever met us."

John could understand why Bobby was trying to warn him off but it was this or the army and at least this way, he would actively be saving people.

"You know, my dad was a retired royal marine commando and when I was about 4, I said I wanted to be exactly like him so he started to show me how to fight as like a joke but when I got older, I actually had a talent for it so I took up boxing and rugby and kept training with my dad. He started taking me to a shooting range when I said I wanted to be a soldier and it just went from there. If I joined the army, I'm not being big headed but I wouldn't be able to fight on the front lines, I'd be a medic that didn't see any fighting. Not that I especially want to hurt people, I just want to help people. Hunting means I can help people with the skill set I have now so I will."

John hadn't realised, but he was completely set on hunting and the resolve in his voice must have carried through to Bobby as all he did was shrug and say,

"Fine, but this life ain't normal, once you're in, you can't really get out. Just so you know."

Bobby sounded reluctant but when John looked across, he could see the acceptance in the man's eyes and he knew he would have an ally and maybe, if he played his cards right, a teacher.

"Now enough with heart to heart, we're almost here an' I don't want Missouri thinking I've gone all soft." He sounded gruff but there was amusement in his voice that made John smile.

The house they pulled up at looked for all intents and purposes, completely normal, as if someone had taken a picture of what the perfect white picket fence house should like and then built it. John walked behind Bobby as they made their way to the door and he waited patiently as the older man knocked.

The door opened to show an older black woman that he took to be Missouri and he was ushered into the sitting room after introductions had been made.

"So, Bobby Singer, you said you needed my help with somethin' I was not expecting you to bring a little British boy with you." John bristled at that, Harry had always teased him about his height but he could tell Missouri wasn't being mean.

"Straight to the point?" Bobby just huffed and carried on, "we brought in a demon the other day and John saw, long story short, he asked for proof that we were telling the truth about all the supernatural stuff so we took him down to see it. It went crazy, screaming and struggling as soon as it saw the kid and we didn't know what else to do."

For the first time since they arrived, Missouri looked straight at him and raised an eyebrow, John just stared back at her, not knowing what she could be seeing, he kept his mind blank just in case. As he had been watching her face so intently, he noticed when her body went tense and her eyes narrowed, this in turn put him more on guard and he straightened up defiantly.

"Could you give us a minute Bobby?" The other man looked reluctant but eventually just adjusted his hat and stood, making his way to the door but not without sending John a reassuring look first.

"John, everything's going to be okay, I just want to take a look around in your mind and it works better if it's just the two of us." Her voice had gone soft and it reminds him a little of Harry when she used to comfort him when he got hurt.

John nodded and closed his eyes when she put her fingers to his temples. At first, there was nothing but soon a gentle pressure started up behind his eyes but with a squeeze of her hands, he relaxed and let her in. For a few minutes, Missouri just looked around and occasionally made pained noises, probably from looking at some of his more painful memories, he thought but then something changed, she froze and John started to feel a pressure in his skull again, different than before.

"That shouldn't be there," it seemed like Missouri was talking to herself but John opened his eyes anyway, making eye contact. He tilted his head questioningly, "you have a wall in your mind, I've only ever seen really strong psychics make blocks this strong and you're not doing it on purpose, I wonder if I can break it." She closed her eyes in concentration and the pressure in his head grew to a painful throb that made him want to pull away but he stayed still, feeling that old power coming to the forefront of his mind, just like it had when that demon had been exorcised.

Missouri was murmuring to herself as sweat started to dot her forehead and all of a sudden, the pressure eased but not as if she had stopped, as if the wall had broken. All John heard was a startled gasp before bright white light started to pour out of Missouri's eyes and mouth, he stared transfixed and watched her, unable to move as her mouth moved as if she was forming words.

As quickly as it started, the light fled and Missouri pulled her hands away on John's face and stumbled away from him, staring at him, horrified. She moved forward again and pushed him roughly towards the door, muttering to herself. The door was pulled open and he was shoved through Bobby looked up startled and worried, looking warily at Missouri as she spoke, "You keep him away from me and if you know what's good for you, you'll get away from him too. He's dangerous and I can see why that demon reacted the way it did."

With those words, the psychic slammed the front door closed and Bobby turned to look at him shell-shocked, "What the hell did you do!"

John could only look at him with wide eyes as he felt that old power thrumming through his veins, this time it was not fading. He remembered vividly the white light that had poured out of Missouri and he just stared at Bobby as he whispered,

"I have no idea."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter up tomorrow :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy this chapter, a lot happens in it so have fun!

The silence in the van was stifling but John couldn’t stop his mind from analysing everything that had happened in the last hour. As they left Lawrence, Bobby had demanded an explanation and he had filled in every detail he could. Bobby was obviously sceptical but he seemed to accept John’s explanation for now as his hand was no longer white-knuckled on the steering wheel.

 

The power that had poured out of him and into Missouri hadn’t felt dangerous, if anything, it had felt comforting, warm, as if it was a part of him that had been missing all his life and even with everything that had happened lately, he felt better in himself than he had for years. He tried to reassure Bobby of this but he had just put him even more on edge.

 

However, both the demon and Missouri had said that he was dangerous and it had him worried so John thought it would be a good idea to test it out. Closing his eyes, he focused on the new feeling and felt a warmth cover him, opening his eyes sharply, he looked down at himself and was relieved to see that he wasn’t glowing. That would have been awkward. 

 

While he had the ‘power’ at the forefront of his mind, he found that it was always changing, pulsing in time with his heartbeat and as he let his eyes fall out of focus, John started to see a soft white light coiling around his fingers and arms, stunned, he looked across at Bobby but it seemed only John could see it. It was incredible, he had always thought he was totally normal, as everyday as they came but it was clear to him now that he wasn’t. He let the power dissipate as they got closer to Sioux Falls.

\------------------------------------------------------------

“Right so, at least now we have somewhere to start. White light. Ok”

Ever since they had reached the house, Bobby had been muttering to himself and the older hunter had shut himself in his ‘library’ after gathering a few books from various rooms about the house, apparently leaving John to entertain himself.

 

He wanted to help, it was John that may be the danger to Bobby’s little mismatched family and he didn’t want to risk hurting anyone, especially either of the two boys. He didn’t know them well but he thinks they could be friends eventually, if Dean could ever get over being floored by John. 

 

He went up the stairs and into one of the rooms he had seen Bobby coming out of, it was pretty much filled floor to ceiling with books and had an old cow skull on the desk, there was even what looked like chemistry equipment piled up on a bedside table. Dismissing this, John made his way over to some of the older looking books and looked over the spines despairingly, he didn’t know anything about any of this stuff, he wasn’t like Bobby, he didn’t know where to start or what to look for. 

 

John looked at the books again and, taking a punt, he let his eyes unfocus and reached out a hand towards them. He saw the light start to curl around his fingers and extend to his forearm, well he had managed to summon it, now what does he do with it?

As if sensing his thoughts, the light started to extend from his fingers to envelope some of the books, then moving on as if unsatisfied. John didn’t really understand what was happening and was holding his breath, not wanting to break the spell as the light kept examining books. After a few minutes, the light enveloped one book in particular and it started to friggin’ move. John watched stunned as the book was pulled away from the shelf, apparently he was concentrating too much on the movement of the book so when the light decided to dissipate, he almost wasn’t fast enough to catch the book as it fell from the shelf with nothing there to support it.

 

If there had been anyone else in the room with him, they would have told him that there was never a danger of it hitting the floor as John had moved so fast that his arm was a blur. But there was no one there, so he didn’t know.

 

Bringing the book to eye level, John looked at the spine and read the title,

‘Celestial Beings and their Offspring’

The words looked a bit strange but John could still make out the title clearly and he again didn’t know what to think, as far as he knew, celestial was usually related to something not of the Earth. He wasn’t sure but he didn’t think he was an alien.

 

Walking over to the armchair in the corner of the room, he opened the book and started to read, hoping there was something useful in it and he wasn’t just going crazy.

\------------------------------------------------------------

John read well into the night and he was fascinated, the book turned out to be all about the beings of heaven and he found out all about the hierarchy of angels and the story of how Lucifer fell from grace. When he was younger, his mum had made him go to Sunday school and he vaguely recognised some of the names from then but this was much more in depth than those lessons all those years ago. 

 

However, the most interesting part by far was the war. The war between the angels and the ‘children of the angels’, the Nephilim. It had happened after Lucifer had fell, angels had started to fall in love with humans and the Nephilim were the result and things were fine for a while but as they grew, they started to become more and more out of control. The sheer power from the mix of a human soul and angel grace was ridiculously powerful and it made the children go mad. Archangels, the only angels powerful enough to take them on, were dispatched to eliminate them all.

 

The whole recount of the war resonated something within John and he knew that there was a good chance that this had something to do with him. Reading a bit further on, he found that halfway through the war, the Nephilim discovered a way to hide themselves from the angels so, in turn, the angels created a way to suss them out. Apparently, a ring of holy oil set on fire was one of the only ways to trap an angel, it also happened to be the only way to find a Nephilim as every single one would be allergic to the stuff. It wouldn’t burn like holy water would a demon but if it touched the half-angel, they would be permanently marked so they would never be able to hide again.

 

John could feel the tiredness in his eyes and he closed the book wearily, the holy oil was hard to come by and he couldn’t say that he actually believed any of what he had read. It was a good story but if it proved to be true then his outlook on life would be altered, God would be real, angels would be real and if he truly was what he suspected, then there was a chance he would be hunted like a monster. There was another thing that was troubling him as well, a Nephilim had to have an angel parent and a human one, that meant that either his mum or dad was an angel, or worse, neither were actually his biological parents. It didn’t even bear thinking about. It would mean Harry wasn’t his sister and even if they fought, it didn’t mean he cared any less.

 

Deciding to sleep on his newfound knowledge, he put the book on the floor and curled up in the armchair, falling asleep quickly and easily.

\------------------------------------------------------------------

The morning after, John was still unsure but he knew he had to tell Bobby so he went downstairs with the angel book under his arm. Bobby was in the kitchen looking a bit worse for wear drinking what looked like tar but John was tired enough to not care so he poured some for himself, ignoring the hunter’s enquiring look as he plonked the big book down on the table. Ever the gentlemen, Bobby waited until he was clearly more awake and then figured he couldn’t wait anymore and asked, 

“So you planning on explainin’ or do I have to read your mind?” John knew Bobby wouldn’t want to spend time reading the whole book when John could just give him the cliff notes and be done with it.

 

“I found that book last night on one of your shelves and to cut a long story short, it’s all about angels and it says that thousands of years ago, there used to be things called Nephilim, half angel-half human. They were really powerful and used to go crazy with it but their signature thing was white light. There’s a test to expose one in there and there’s a list of some of the things they can do, powers and stuff. I fell asleep before I read all of it but I found that test and it’s the best bet I can find.” John just sat there as he spoke and sipped at his coffee quietly, not even wincing at the taste.

 

Bobby on the other hand was staring at him and John had an overwhelming urge to wave a hand in front of his face. He resisted and waited patiently until Bobby gathered his thoughts enough to speak.

“So you just happened to find this book and it had all the answers we need?”

A nod.

“And you just happen to be able read Enochian?”

At this John just shrugged and replied, “To be perfectly honest, I thought it was English but I see now it’s not and it does say in that book that Nephilim are good with languages. Not that I particularly want to prove myself right but this seems better than being a demon or some other thing.”

Again, Bobby just stared at him and after some deliberation that clearly showed on his face, he just nodded and asked, “What do you need?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there’s any confusion about the story so far, let me know :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next chapter :)  
> Enjoy!

Somehow, Bobby had managed to get his hands on some holy oil. John didn’t even bother asking how because he was just too anxious to care. If the oil left some sort of mark on him then he was a Nephilim, simple as that and even though it would be a nice open and shut answer, it still put him on edge that he was not supposed to be able to control the power.

 

Shutting away all of the dark thoughts that had swirling around in his mind, John focused on Bobby coming back into the room. In his hand he carried some sort of old jar with a spout, it kind of reminded him of a tea kettle but he quickly discarded that thought and straightened up into attention as his father had taught him.

 

Bobby observed the change in stance with nothing but a raised eyebrow and a mumbled, “Hell, exactly like Dean.” John just stared steadily, his face not betraying his nerves as he held out a hand for the jar. Reluctantly, Bobby put it in his hand stepped back, not knowing what was about to happen.

 

He took a deep breath as he pulled the cork out of the bottle and the sickly sweet scent of the oil washed over him. John held out his hand and with barely a hesitation, poured a few drops of the oil onto his skin. At first nothing happened and he turned back to look at Bobby, half relieved and half worried that he still didn’t know what he was but as soon as he moved, a searing pain cut through him from his hand, straight to his heart.

 

The pain was almost unbearable and he soon dropped to his knees as his legs could no longer hold his weight. John felt the almost familiar power in him rise up in what seemed like anger and pour out of his mouth and eyes, Bobby was forced to cover his ears and shut his eyes as a result of the light and high pitched ringing coming from John.

 

Finally, the pain subsided to just a dull ache on the centre of his back below his shoulder blades. He still shook with the aftershocks of the pain but eventually managed to lift up his head. At once, John realized that his eyesight was 100 times better and he could hear all the way into Sioux Falls, random facts and observations took shape in his mind and without needing to ask, he knew that a knife on the mantelpiece was used for carving instead of fighting. John could see conclusions that he never would have even considered before and it was like his mind ran at a higher speed. Looking into his mind for an explanation, John found that he knew exactly what had happened and with amazement colouring his tone, he relayed it all to Bobby.

 

“I’m a Nephilim, there’s no doubt. I have a mark, I can feel it on my back and I just know. I also know that I just gained all the knowledge that I should have had at birth but didn’t because some sort of angelic shield was put up around it in my mind. It’s incredible, I think I probably know spells now that have been lost for millennia.” John didn’t even realize that Bobby was watching him warily, as if he was about to combust at any moment.

 

“Well that’s all well and good but do you have control of it John? Because from I just saw and felt, you have a hell of a lot of juice and to be quite honest it’s worrying me a bit.” Seeing the carefully masked fear on the older man’s face, John came crashing back to earth with a resounding thump and he at last saw the blood on the side of his friend’s face. “Jesus Bobby, I hurt you didn’t I? Damn, I’m sorry, I have control of it now, I swear,” and even though there were millions of things that could easily overwhelm him, he focused on Bobby and walked towards him slowly with his hands up in a placating gesture.

 

“I just want to look at your ears, make sure I didn’t damage them.” The pleading look on his face must have helped as Bobby allowed him closer without shying away, letting John take a look at his head. Just by looking at Bobby and his pinched features, he could tell that the older man was suffering a headache as a result of him and without any conscious thought, John brought up two fingers on his left hand to rest on Bobby’s forehead and he cured any hint of pain.

 

Startled, John blinked and withdrew his hand, the only thing he could think to say being, “Apparently I can heal as well.” Bobby just gave him a look that said, ‘Idjit’ without him having to say it.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A week later, the three Winchesters came back and John treated the older hunter’s wounds; as he had been taught at Bart’s, not using his newfound healing powers. They had agreed-him and Bobby-that it would probably be better if the Winchesters didn’t find out about John’s gifts and so, life continued on as normal. Or as normal as the five hunters could hope for.

 

It was a few weeks after the holy oil revelation when Sam and Dean first made their way up the stairs to the room that John had been given. John had been reading an old Enochian text that Bobby had always been curious about when there came a timid knock on the door and, thinking it was Bobby, John called out a soft, “Come in.” Sam and Dean both came in and the younger had a book clutched to his chest, if John didn’t know better, he would say the kid looked excited. Dean on the other hand, just scowled at him and rubbed at his nose.

 

His new sense threw observations at him that he would have otherwise missed and John immediately knew why he had company. Keeping his deductions to himself, he closed the book and put it down on his lap.

 

“Oh hi. Erm, what can I do for you?” John knew that before his mental block had been lifted he had been a terrible liar but now it seemed as if he could convince people of anything. Bobby had theorised that it was a form of mind control and that it was something he had to try and control (it did bother him a bit that he might be able to manipulate people) so John took up this harmless, awkward character and it seemed to have put Bobby’s worries at ease. If keeping up his new image meant that he had to wear big, comfortable jumpers and drink copious amounts of tea, then that was a sacrifice he was willing to make.

 

It was Sam that answered in a giddy voice, “Hi John! Bobby said that you were really good at Latin so I was wondering if you would help us. Dad says we need to learn if we’re going to be good hunters.” While Sam was babbling, Dean just crossed his arms and glared at him, John could feel the twin holes being burned into his forehead. He could sense jealousy rolling off of the taller boy and John thought that it would be a good idea to clear the air before he even attempted to become friends with Sam.

 

“Sure Sam, I’ll help you in a bit but I’d like to talk to Dean first,” he glanced over at Dean to see a surprised look aimed at him and John looked him straight in the eye, totally relaxed as he continued, “if you don’t mind?” John phrased it as a question, but he wasn’t really asking. Dean just nodded at him and walked out of his bedroom and onto the landing. Sam was looking at where Dean had just been stood with a wary look on his face but John assured him he would be back soon and that he should start reading his book.

John walked past Dean and led him out of the house and into the salvage yard. When they reached a clearing, John stopped and turned to look at the taller boy while he assumed the attention pose that he knew so well. Dean just looked at him with amusement, as if he was a child playing games but he could only stare back unflinchingly. Eventually Dean looked away and cleared his throat; John felt an irrational sense of accomplishment as the bigger man looked away first.

 

Sighing, John slumped and looked at Dean exasperatedly. He really didn’t want them to fight and this as not the way to resolve whatever animosity Dean was harbouring towards him so, deciding to be the mature one, John asked, “Do have a problem with me?” It came out much more bluntly than he had meant it to but Dean’s head snapped up and he seemed to have a new sort of respect in his eyes.

 

“Yeah I do. You’ve just come here, we don’t know anything about you, or whether we can trust you even though Bobby says you’re a good guy! I don’t want my little brother anywhere near anyone I can’t trust.” Dean had gained confidence as he spoke but once finished he seemed to deflate and looked John dead in the eye. “You do seem ok but you’re like, too good to be true. You’re everything Sam wants in a friend and the way he talks about you, I don’t like it because what if you’re a bad guy and you hurt him. I’d have to kill you.”

 

All the while Dean is talking, John is genuinely listening but he can’t help but burst out laughing. Dean does not join in. He can’t help it and the laughter dissolves into giggles. “Dean. Think about it. If you really had the slightest inkling that I was a danger to you or your family, you would not have told me any of this and you would not have hesitated to go to your Dad or Bobby.” Dean just looks at him with sheer surprise and wonder and John almost starts to giggle again but manages to restrain himself.

 

“You know what John? I think you’re right.” Dean just starts to laugh but John thinks it’s aimed more towards himself. “I don’t trust you and I don’t know if I ever will but I think I’m convinced you’re not going to kill us in our sleep.” Dean holds out a hand and John takes it in truce even though he can tell Dean wants to say something more.

 

He doesn’t have to wait long.

 

“Just because we have a truce doesn’t mean that I don’t want a rematch of before, I still gotta prove to Sam and my Dad that no little British guy can beat me.” It’s said with a thin smile and a hard squeeze of his hand but all John does is pat his cheek and give the taller man a condescending look. “Whenever you’re ready Dean.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be up tomorrow :)  
> Kudos and comments would be much appreciated!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot happens in this chapter so hold onto your hats people, it's going to be a bumpy ride :)

Dean had to admit it, the guy had nerve, he didn’t even look wary and it was starting to annoy him. No one had been able to beat him for a while apart from his Dad and Bobby and the way that John had just stumble across this life and slotted right in didn’t sit right with him. It also didn’t help that Sam would not stop talking about how awesome John apparently was, and Bobby seemed to think the sun shined out of his ass or something.

Dean didn’t even think for a second that it could be jealousy that was making him hate the guy. If John was a bit less of a know it all, Dean could see them maybe becoming friends. First he had to put the smaller boy in his place.

He pulled his hand away from John and squared his shoulders, he would not be caught unawares again. “Fine then shortstack, let’s get this settled now shall we?” Dean knew that he could be intimidating, hell, he killed monsters for a living so he wasn’t exactly afraid of a man whose head barely came up to his shoulder.

The problem was that John seemed to be one of those people that never got angry, he was just staring at him with a little smile on his face that Dean wanted to wipe right off. He wasn’t even ready, John just stood there with his shoulders slumped and him hands by his side. Dean saw red. He hated it when people didn’t take him seriously and this older kid was just riling him up.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------

John knew it was coming, he had been watching Dean for tells and with his enhanced eyesight, he saw exactly when Dean’s muscles tensed and a fist was thrown at his face. With the prior knowledge, it was only too easy to step to the side, catch the bigger man’s arm and twist it behind his back. He kicked out a leg to the back of Dean’s knee and he went down, struggling the whole way but then John spoke and he used a voice that he had only used once before and that had been when some guys had been picking on Harry at school for having a girlfriend.

 

Lowering his head to put his face right behind Dean’s, John growled into his ear, “I have no problem with you Dean but know that you will never beat me and if you try again, I will hurt you.” Harry had never told him why that voice was so scary but it definitely worked as Dean stopped moving immediately and held up his other hand.

 

“Okay, alright man, I got it. I think we’re good now. I just wanted to know if you lived up to what Sam’s been saying.” John let him go and Dean jumped to his feet but this time, there was no cocky bravado as he held out a hand.

 

“I mean it John, I’m sorry man, I was an ass. Just ask Sammy, he tell you it’s my main character trait.” Dean rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly and hoped secretly that he never got on John’s bad side again.

 

“Fair enough, we’ll call it even shall we, start over? It’s nice to meet you, I’m Doctor John Watson.”

 

“Good to meet ya Doc, I’m Dean Winchester and you know what? I think this is going to be the start of a beautiful friendship.” John was just realising that Dean was really only 16 and to be fair, he was a bit of a dork. He voiced this out loud and Dean just slung an arm over the shorter man’s shoulder and pulled him back to the house, laughing all the while.

 

 

2 months later

 

Things had been going extraordinarily well. John could safely say that he was enjoying hunting with Bobby and the Winchester boys (he didn’t really know the older John very well as he was usually away following leads about some yellow eyed demon). While hunting and learning more about his powers-in secret mind as him and Bobby were still unsure about using them regularly-John got to know the boys much better and any previous animosity was between him and Dean was gone. He had discovered that he could move things with his mind (sans the weird white light), he could sense emotions and some thoughts. He was slightly wary about that though and refused to dig through people’s thoughts as it was a violation of their privacy, Bobby seemed to agree and seemed very happy that John had control over himself.

 

The three of them were out in the salvage yard shooting at cans one day and it was actually a nice day, although he had been in America for what seemed like ages now, he couldn’t get over the difference in the weather. Dean and Sam had been very impressed with his shooting skills and these competitions had been a common occurrence and while Sam was taking his turn, John stripped off his shirt and put it down on the bonnet of the beat up truck behind him.

 

He had forgotten that as a result of the holy oil, he now had a rather large mark on his back but he was soon reminded when Dean exclaimed behind him. “Dude! That is so badass man! You’ve got a friggin’ sword on your back.” A sword? John had never seen it as it was on his back but he had thought it would have been some sort of scar instead of a tattoo.

 

Thinking quickly, John couldn’t let the boys know that he didn’t actually know about the tattoo so he turned around sheepishly and said, “Yeah, I got it a little while ago when I thought I was going to join the army. My sister said it would be cool so…yeah.” Dean and Sam had both put down their guns and were now coming towards him, Sam reached out a hand and spun him back around so they could see the mark.

 

“It’s cool! It’s a massive broadsword right down the middle of your back!” John hadn’t known that but he was quite happy it was something cool and not a fluffy little puppy anything equally humiliating. He couldn’t help but wonder what it meant though, there had to be a reason there was now a sword on his back.

 

Dean came around to face him but instead of his normal happy expression, he looked curious, “John, you have a sister? Why are you here if your family is in England?” John hadn’t told anyone his history apart from Bobby but he really did trust these two boys so he thought, what harm could it do?

 

“Yeah, about that. I used to have a sister but there was a car accident. My mum, dad and sister all died.” There was nothing he could do about the almost robotic tone of voice he was using and they both flinched at the cold look in his eyes. “They were my whole family and I’m all alone now, there was nothing for me in London and I had to get away so I came here.”

 

It was uncanny how similar the two brother’s looked when they were serious. Dean was looking at him with what seemed like respect and Sam, while the look wasn’t full of pity, it was much softer than Dean’s. “Well you’ve got us now haven’t you? As a family? That is, if you want us?” Sam spoke so earnestly and John could do nothing but melt.

 

To tell the truth, John felt a tell-tale burning at the backs of his eyes and he cleared his throat, blinking rapidly. Even so, his voice was a little hoarse when he went to Sam and put a hand on his shoulder and said, “Thank you Sam. I would be honoured to consider you family.” He couldn’t help but glance at Dean while he said this but the older brother was just looking at the younger with a fond smile on his face.

 

John was so busy trying to control his tears that almost missed Dean’s quiet words. “Our mom died when we were little, I was 4 and Sam was 6 months. Dad’s been looking for the demon that did it ever since.”

He was astounded, John knew what had happened, Bobby had told him, but he had never expected Dean to be the Winchester that told him, maybe Sam, although he and Dean had bonded over the training their dad’s had put them through. He was filled with a sudden determination and spoke with a strong voice that he had only heard before from his dad, “I’ll help you get it. The demon. I’ll do everything that I can to help you. We are family after all.”

 

It was at that moment when John was seized with the urge to tell them what he was but Bobby had been adamant that he keep it to himself and while he did trust the brothers, he trusted Bobby a bit more and so kept his mouth shut.

 

While John was thinking, Sam and Dean shared a moment of silence for their Mom before they returned to the shooting competition with renewed vigour.

 

 

2 months later

 

“John. Are you sure about this? These gifts of yours, they’re not an exact science are they?” John had gone straight to Bobby after he had woken up with a bad feeling. The last time he had felt anything like it was when he had met that demon months ago but this was even more potent which, he supposed, made sense as the mental block was gone and his powers were much more effective.

 

“Yes Bobby. I’m sure. There’s a demon near here, close, probably somewhere in Sioux Falls. I know you don’t want to trust anything that is remotely supernatural but this is bad, this demon could hurt someone.” Bobby looked at him appraisingly and he straightened as was his habit but it seemed like it was unnecessary as Bobby turned around and picked up a duffel from underneath his desk while he levelled an expectant look at John.

 

“You comin’ or what?” John had thought Bobby would call John to take care of the demon as it was usually him that hunted them but apparently not. It was then that Bobby’s words registered, “Me? You want me to come with you on a demon hunt?” He spluttered at the older hunter. John had been on hunts during his time at the salvage yard as Bobby thought it was only right, he had abilities (fighting and shooting, not weird light that moves things) and he should use them. Sam and Dean had been on hunts as well of course but none of the three of them had ever been on a hunt for a demon. The brothers were going to be so jealous that Bobby took him on a hunt for a demon.

 

“John. You know every language known to man. You know spells and exorcisms that I’ve never heard of and even though I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to use the physical powers too much as you could become out of control, I’d be stupid to not ask you to help when you are so obviously better equipped than any hunter.” John could only stare at him stunned and nod stupidly.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They were almost in Sioux Falls when John felt a pull in his gut, it wasn’t painful but it did make his head snap up in surprise and he noticed they had just passed an old, rundown house on the side of the road. “Bobby, not to alarm you or anything but I’m fairly sure the demon was in that house we just passed.” He turned to look at Bobby and almost laughed at the shocked look on his face but after a moment, he nodded and pulled over before turning the truck around.

“You sure? What did you see?” John didn’t know whether to tell the truth but decided that he should trust the older hunter. “I felt like a pull in my stomach, it was like before, you know when I first saw that demon but stronger.” It was difficult to explain but apparently Bobby saw he was telling the truth and pulled into a side road a few hundred meters away from the house.

They both got out and Bobby went straight to the bed of the truck, pulling out two old army canteens and two shotguns. John took one of the flasks and felt a shiver pass through him, not unlike a caffeine rush but he dismissed it as adrenaline before taking the shotgun. “These are filled with rock salt and are usually pretty good but using the holy water is better, you got that?” John just nodded as he felt a strange clam wash over him and his senses sharpened.

“Your job is to just keep it away from me as I’m doin’ the exorcism so be careful.” Bobby did seem a bit hesitant to send him in but John smiled reassuringly and-without knowing he’d done it-sent a wave of calm over the older hunter that set him at ease. They crept up to the side door and John felt the pull in his gut intensify but his heartbeat slowed down, it was a strange sensation but he pushed through it and focused on the sounds of movement inside the house.

The side door opened without a noise when John pushed it which he thought was a bit wrong, the house was old, it should have made some noise but he just shrugged and continued through the door waiting for Bobby to come in behind him. They waked towards the main room and peered around the door frame to see a woman holding up a chalice in front of her face. John knew without a doubt that he couldn’t let her use the chalice and darted forwards to knock it out of her hand, she spun around and threw a punch at his stomach that he dodged.

“Bobby!” After his shout, he heard Bobby start the exorcism but he had bigger problems, namely the demon in front of him that was starting to look quite terrified as John advanced on her, trying to restrain her in some way so Bobby could finish. However, she inevitably didn’t want to cooperate and she threw a hand out in front of his chest as if to stop him but John just carried on not realising that he shouldn’t have been able to and put his hand on her forehead.

He could no longer hear the exorcism and chanced a quick glance around to see Bobby pinned to the wall behind him. When he saw this, it was as if he was no longer in charge of his body and his hand started to glow bright white. There was a voice shouting but he couldn’t make out any distinct words as he watched the woman’s eyes burn away. A part of him, the doctor, was screaming at him to stop but he couldn’t, this was a demon, it had to die, it was evil.

As the light died away he dropped the body to the ground and stared at it for a moment before his mind cleared. “Jesus!” Even though he knew was useless, John dropped to the ground and tried to heal her but before he could lay his fingers on her forehead, Bobby was pulling his hands behind his back in such a way that if he moved, his shoulder would have dislocated.

“Stop John. Stop struggling. She’s gone. There’s nothing you can do.” It vaguely registered that he was crying and he just couldn’t stop and Bobby wouldn’t let him go but as his body started to shake and the edges of his vision went dark, it didn’t matter anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry to leave you like this but the next chapter probably won't be up until Wednesday so please bare with me until then.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Holds up white flag, comes out from behind wall*   
> I'm so sorry this has taken so long, I promised it would only be a few days but writer's block is an evil monster.   
> I have 2 weeks before I go to a new school so until then the chapters should come pretty quick. Hopefully :)  
> Enjoy!

He was a murderer.

A monster.

Not human.

Something Bobby and the Winchesters were supposed to hunt.

These were all the things that had run through his mind since he had woken up strapped to the bed in the panic room. Bobby was probably telling the boys and John everything about him and they were probably trying to figure out how to kill him before he hurt anyone else.

John could safely say that at this point, he would welcome it, hell, he would do it himself if he could. He had killed that girl, the one Bobby would have been able to save if not for him. She could have been exorcised just fine and returned to her normal life but oh no, John’s angelic nature just had to go against everything he had ever been taught by his Father and as a doctor and burn out her eyes.

It was an image that would haunt him forever.

It would have been so easy to escape with his enhanced strength but he wouldn’t, he had to face up to what he had done and he didn’t want to hurt any more people, it would be better for everyone if Nephilim stayed extinct.

John was brought out of his musings as the panic room door was pulled open, he took only a moment to steel himself against the idea of one of his new family thinking of him as a monster but he supposed it was called for. It was these thoughts that then caused his confusion as Bobby was the only one to step through the door and empty handed at that. His face must have portrayed something as Bobby halted outside the devils trap (that had no effect on him).

“Well, this is a turn-up isn’t it?” John’s confusion only grew as Bobby remained totally calm, his face free of any disgust or fear.

“Bobby?” He tried to school his voice into sounding stronger, like the soldier he still wanted to be but he couldn’t manage it and it sounded weak and resigned.

“Oh don’t get all self-sacrificing boy, it doesn’t suit you. Here.” The older hunter stepped forward and was about to release John from his bindings but he was stopped by a wave of light. John was horrified that he appeared to have no control over his powers anymore and Bobby suddenly didn’t look so sure of himself, in fact he even took a step back.

“John, come on, get a hold of yourself, I’m not gunna hurt you.” The tone was gruff but wary as well and John couldn’t take it anymore. He sprang up off the bed, hardly even noticing the leather straps snapping but he was soon charging towards Bobby and pinning him against the walls of the panic room.

The older hunter had never seen anything like it, John’s eyes were glowing bright blue and the walls behind the shorter boy were getting darker and shapes were starting to form. John wished he could say the thinly veiled fear in his adopted fathers eyes didn’t make him flinch but it did and it sobered him up. Very quickly.

John pulled his arm away from Bobby’s throat and stepped away, his hands wouldn’t stop shaking and he could feel the stinging in his eyes. “No Bobby! You won’t hurt me but I could hurt you! I could kill all of you without even much effort.” He could tell the hunter was shaking his head because he could read the disturbances in the air and the instinctual use of his grace was just making him panic even more.

“No! You don’t know how hard it is for me to hold back! Even now, I can feel the power crowding in on my mind and it’s driving me crazy. I’m turning into what all the books said I would!” John was grasping his head now and even though Bobby was trying to pull his hands away from his hair, he was too strong and he pushed the man away.

The only thing that broke through the panicked fog and made his mind clear was the groaning now coming from his friend. John’s mind was reeling as he went to help Bobby up and stopped still when the hunter pulled away from him. It was with a guilt laden mind that he reached up two fingers to Bobby’s forehead and healed him of the broken ribs and punctured lung.

Bobby slowly made his way back onto his feet but instead of coming towards John like he had before, he kept his distance and looked at the pained man in front of him with nothing but distrust. John tried to avoid his eyes and backed away to the other side of the room, dreading the hateful words that were surely going to come from the man he had come to care for greatly.

“Go ahead. Say it. I’m a monster. I need to be hunted, taken care of. Say it!” Clearly his emotions were all over the place, John had started speaking in a soft tone of voice and ended up shouting at him. He was just burning bridges left, right and centre.

“Is that what you want me to say? Is that what you want to hear? That we’re going to hunt you? That you can just give up on everything because you made a mistake? Well you’re in for a big wakeup call boy, I’m not going to tell you you’re a monster because you’re not. The vampires and werewolves and demons we hunt are monsters because they kill for pleasure or because they have to. You did it to say my life. You did it to save lives and that, is why you’re not a monster. You might not be all human kid but to me? To Dean and Sam? You’re family. You don’t hunt family.”

John could only stop and stare at the older man, his monologue had been the most he had ever heard Bobby say in one go and it was sinking in that they didn’t hate him. Yes, they were wary but they didn’t want to hurt him or see him hurt. That didn’t mean he was okay with what had happened.

“I-I just wish-“

“What?” Bobby’s voice was so much gentler than it had been before.

“I-I just wish I could be human.” Even as John said them, the words didn’t really register as blood started to rush in his ears and spots started to show in his vision. Spells were playing in front of his eyes like a film reel and it took him a while to understand the new knowledge in his head but when he did, he let out a huge sigh of relief.

“Oh. I _can_ be human.” It was clear Bobby had no idea what John was talking about but at that moment, he really didn’t care. He strode over to the older hunter and grasped his shoulders.

“Bobby! I can do it, I can be human. There’s an old Enochian spell that will separate my grace from my soul so that I cannot use it. I won’t hurt anyone!” Even though he knew he was forgetting something, something important but that thought as pushed to the back of his mind as he started to list the ingredients he would need for the spell. He was so preoccupied in fact that he didn’t realise Bobby was trying to get his attention.

“Woah John, calm down. Explain what’s goin’ on in your head.” It took a moment for his eyes to focus on the man in front of him but he soon straightened and shook off the fog that had clouded his mind. John was much calmer after he sealed his excitement behind a calm façade and he faced Bobby with only a little impatience showing in his eyes.

“Bobby, there is a spell that can make me essentially human. I’ll still have all my knowledge and fighting skills so I won’t be defenceless but I won’t have any supernatural powers so I won’t go crazy and lose control. This would fix everything! I could go back to the army without having to worry about showing I’m more than human!” John knew immediately that he had said something wrong when Bobby’s face started to go red and he looked livid.

Oh. Bobby hadn’t known he wanted to go back to the army. Oops.

\-------

This was all happening too fast. A minute ago John had been convinced they were going to hunt him, then he was babbling to himself about some weird spell that would make him human and now he was talking about joining the army! Has the kid gone crazy?

Bobby could feel an ache building behind his eyes but he stared resolutely at John anyway. He didn’t know what to say, he might not have known him for even a year but he was like the son he had never had and even though he knew the Winchesters were his family, he couldn’t help but feel closer to John than he had to anyone in a long time. To be perfectly honest, he didn’t want the boy to leave and as he thought this, he felt the anger drain away and his shoulders slumped.

“John have you even thought about this? I’m not talking about the army because I knew you wanted to do that anyway but could you really do that? Separate two halves of your soul?” John had been very clear about how he saw himself, the kid was the only survivor from a crash that killed his family so not only did he have a bad case of survivor’s guilt, he had just killed a woman. He obviously wasn’t in a good headspace and it made Bobby question whether he was of a right mind to make a choice as big as this one.

Luckily though, his words seemed to have some effect and John seemed more sober than he had since the older hunter had entered the room. He was back to being the perfect little soldier he had been raised to be and while it still irked him how much he resembled Dean, he ignored it in favour of listening to John’s reasoning.

“Yes Bobby, I have thought about this and if you know me at all, you’ll realise that my mind is set. I refuse to be responsible for more deaths and I couldn’t live with myself if I hurt you or any of the Winchesters.” There was steel in his voice that Bobby hadn’t heard for months.

“Alright fine. That I can agree with. If you are sure the spell works and will not do you any harm, then fine. I will help you get the things you need.” John seemed to brighten at the show of support but as he opened his mouth to speak, Bobby cut him off. He was not finished.

“However, about you joining the army. Have you thought that through?”

Whereas John had seemed happier and sure a moment ago, he wasn’t now. He faltered and turned away from his searching stare.

“You know that I wanted to join the army before I met all of you. That…hasn’t changed. I thought it would be enough to help people as we have been doing but I wanted to be a doctor my whole life, _that’s_ how I wanted to help people. I don’t especially want to leave but I don’t think- I don’t think I can stay.” John’s speech was halted but Bobby couldn’t say he was overly surprised, the boy had seemed listless and restless whenever they weren’t hunting and when they were, and it was almost as if he was spoiling for a fight.

“Fair enough, that I understand but what about the boys? I assume you wouldn’t be telling them the truth about what you are so what exactly would be your explanation for the sudden exit? You think they wouldn’t miss you? Dean and Sam have had enough heartache to last a lifetime and you leaving wouldn’t really make things better for them.”

John looked as if he was in pain but he knew it had to be said if he was going to make the right choice.

“It’s better for them if I leave. I love them like brothers but if I ever hurt them for whatever reason, I couldn’t forgive myself. Anyway, they’re young, they would forget me eventually, it’d best if I just left and let them come up with their own explanation. Anything’s better than admitting I’m not human and that I’ve been lying to them for the past 9 months or so.” John seemed so unhappy and it hurt Bobby to see him looking so downtrodden but a small part of him agreed with his reasoning.

If the boys ever found out about John, they wouldn’t forgive either of them for lying, if John was intent on leaving then this would probably be the safest way. It did not mean he had to like it and the look on his face must have shown his distaste as John cringed.

“I want to do this Bobby. I came here to be free of everything for a while but I always planned on going back some time. It’s better I leave now rather than when they become too attached.” Almost on the verge of tears, John’s voice was strained. Bobby hated to see him in that state and roughly strode towards the boy and pulled him into a hug.

“You better stay in touch, you hear me boy? If you go to war and then drop of the face of the Earth, I’ll find ya and I’ll kill ya myself. Don’t test me kid.”

It took all of his willpower to keep his eyes dry but he felt a suspicious wet patch on his shoulder that he gladly ignored when John pulled away with a weak laugh.

“So, what do ya need for this spell?”

“Oh, just a few things, let’s go check upstairs. Wait, aren’t Sam and Dean upstairs?”

“No they’re on a hunt with John. They’ll be gone for more than a week so if we get this spell done and you away before they get back, it’ll make things so much simpler.”

John just gave a sad nod of agreement before making his way out of the panic room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment and let me know what you think about the story :)  
> Even if it's just a smiley face. I like smiley faces :D


	8. Chapter 8

Hello to all readers,  
I'm afraid this is bad news, since the last chapter I've been trying to write more for this story but I have lost all inspiration with it. As a result of this, I am putting this story on hiatus. I'm sorry to the people I promised another chapter to but I think a break from this to work on other stories would be helpful. I'm not giving up on the story, I'm just going to rethink things and work on some other things for now.

Again, I'm sorry for being useless at writing this story but I just can't do anymore right now, I'll keep working on the writer's block though, hope to see you all again soon


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